FIC: And the Seven (H/D) - PG

Title: And The Seven (1/2)
Author: corvidae9
Rating: PG
Word Count: ~12,000
Summary: Yes, but it's Draco's turn to tell that story, and that makes him the bloody hero for once. (H/D)
Warnings: Cracktastic premises, Fractured fairy tales (specifically Snow White :P), Too many Weasley offspring, Adventures in babysitting
Author's Note: miints made the suggestion for the seven dwarves in the comments to red_rahl's chibi h/d (♥!), and then knitmeapony and I ran with it. And then I wrote it down. And then there was a lot of gleeful snickering. Aaand then it got so out of hand it necessitated more than one post. X-posted to my LJ and hp_fairytales

###

Harry sat on the floor with his back to the well-worn sofa in Ron and Luna's house, a lapful of their (finally) sleeping ginger toddler. He was almost dozing himself, until a virtual army of children in different sizes that all somewhat resembled the little one in his lap came running through the door from the kitchen, shrieking, hands full of dripping, half-finished ice cream cones. Rubbing one eye, he tried to glare at Draco, who seemed to be doing the herding, but failed when he caught sight of the look halfway between amusement and disgust on his face.

"UNCLE HARRY, UNCLE HARRY," more than one of them shouted, as a bounce on the cushions of the sofa behind him was followed by Angie Junior's face suddenly suspended upside down over his, hands on Harry's shoulders as her tightly-curled, dark cinnamon pigtails fell along either side of her flushed face.

"Uncle Draco let us set off a whole box of dad and Uncle George's fireworks," she beamed. "You missed it. We almost set the big oak on fire."

The toddler in Harry's lap stretched her little fingers up to grab at his ear and he rocked her unconsciously as he nodded, his eyes darting to a shrugging Draco. "That's... wow. I did miss it, didn't I?"

"And they were so entertained, Uncle Harry," said Draco. "It was amazing. They all stayed in one place, and were easy to control-- err. Corral. When are their parents coming home again?"

"Laaate!!" shouted the two identical boys in horn-rimmed glasses just like their father, yet smeared in ice cream and already wrestling over the last bit of cone left in the one's hand. "Means we can stay here and plaaaaay."

"Lovely," said Draco with a very cheerful, very false smile. "I cannot wait to collect on what I get out of agreeing to this."

"Is it candy, Uncle Draco?" asked a little girl with plump cheeks whose serious expression and near-perfect diction made her sound just like her mother. "Daddy gives me Romanian candy when I've volunteered to do something hard, even if it turns out to be fun. It's called positive reinforcement. Mummy gives me books."

"Oh?" said Draco, patting her on the head twice. "That's lovely, Izzie."

"Well? Is it candy or books?" she asked again, not at all deterred by Draco's dismissal, and Harry snickered, his hand moving to shield the sleeping Celina's head as Angie Junior was knocked over his shoulder by a flying tackle by little Arthur, whooping a triumphant battle cry as he flew. Izzie set disapproving hands on her hips at the roughhousing and muttered, "It really ought to be something good."

"You're telling me," muttered Draco, crossing his arms and covering his mouth with one hand, clearly at wit's end.

Before Harry could try and bail him out, Celina spoke sleepily as she peered up at Harry, tugging on his ear. "Tell me a story, Uncle Harry," she murmured, burrowing further against him, and suddenly there was a new battle cry among the six other children.

Even Jonathan who had already set to meticulously deconstructing the old wireless set in the corner joined them in shouting, "Story! STORY!!"

"Ok, alright," said Harry, "Why don't we--"

"Why don't you all go up and wash your faces and hands," interrupted Draco with the air of having had a very good idea. "And when you get back, I'll tell you all a wonderful story."

"STORY!!" the six older children shouted, inhaling any remaining ice cream and/or dropping anything in hand as they made for the stairs at a run. Celina sighed, "Story," popped a finger in her mouth and shut her eyes again.

"Should I even ask?" said Harry, shifting slightly so that he could let his head fall back against the armrest.

Draco smirked. "Probably not." He surveyed the area thoughtfully, then conjured a thick blanket at his feet. It unrolled itself, sliding under Harry of its own volition, and puffing up to the thickness of a cushion, sprouting more cushions around the edges.

Giggling on the stairs heralded the return of the quickest children and Harry rolled his eyes as he said, "Come on kids. I'm dying to hear this story." As an afterthought, he pointed at Draco and whispered, "Watch yourself. I don't need their parents having ten different sorts of fits over whatever rubbish you fill their heads with."

Angie and Arthur precluded any answer from the suddenly innocent Draco as they raced down the stairs, exclaiming, "Oooh!!" at the setup. As they dive-bombed the blanket for the best spaces, Jonathan, Bobby and Martin followed suit, almost falling over themselves in the rush , leaving Izzie taking careful steps down and settle delicately in the space nearest Draco. The, "Story, story," chant was just beginning again and Draco held his hand up to stop it.

"Silence, you pack of hyenas," Draco said as amiably as he could manage, adding at Harry's Look, "somewhat charming hyenas, granted, but wild animals nonetheless. I've a wonderful tale for you."

Izzie settled her head against Draco's arm and he patted her awkwardly, confused again as he began.

"Once upon a time..."

###

...there was a Devastatingly Handsome Prince. Unfortunately, there is a great deal of story that takes place before we meet him, but know that there will in fact be a prince to save the day. And that he's devastatingly handsome.

At any rate, there was also once a queen with red, red hair like Izzie's here, but she had bright green eyes and though she was ridiculously, inexplicably happy in her kingdom full of fools and Gryffindors with her husband the rather unkempt king, what she desired most of all was a child to carry on the line. As she sat beside the window one cold winter evening, mending frilly underthings, or whatever women sit around and mend, she pricked herself with her needle and a tiny drop of blood welled up at the tip of her finger. After she swore in a very unladylike manner, her attention was drawn away to a shooting star and she quickly pressed her bleeding finger to the frosty windowpane and made a wish.

"I wish for a child with skin as pale and perfect as the snow, lips as red as this blood and eyes spring-bright like mine; with hair..." Here she paused and thought, because being very clever, she knew that one's hair is half of one's natural attraction. Unfortunately, she was also very attached to her husband and didn't think hard enough when she said, "...hair like that of my good husband the king-- black as night and soft as silk."

Clearly, she forgot to specify, "and not a total, perpetual disaster, like that of the king," but regardless, she got her wish and nine months later, give or take, she gave birth to a squalling, smelly bundle of very loud joy. While she was ever so grateful for the child, she was also a little miffed that it was a boy, given that she could no longer name it, 'Snow White'. Or rather, miffed that she tried anyway, but the king could actually imagine the terror of living life as a man with a name like 'Snow White' and convinced her to name the little princess...err... prince, 'Harry'.

###

"I cannot believe you," muttered Harry as the children giggled. Celina stared at Draco through the finger in her mouth and Arthur rolled onto his back over the cushion.

"Is this a true story?" Arthur asked dubiously. "I didn't know Uncle Harry was a prince."

"He's not, silly," said Izzie. "But he's a real-life hero because of how--"

"Anyway," interrupted Arthur.

"Anyway," said Draco, licking his lip in amusement.

###

Anyway, the queen, king and little prince were happy, even though bad things were happening around them. An Evil Sorceror was trying his best to overthrow their kingdom and the king and queen and their army did their best to stop him, but after a year the Evil Sorceror was able to break into the palace. He killed the king and queen, though somehow the prince, even though he was just a baby, was able to defeat the Sorceror. The kingdom was at once incredibly glad but in mourning, and though they all wore black, they danced in the streets for the defeat of the Sorceror.

The Prince was next in line for the throne, but he was too young, and so the council appointed his aunt, the Duchess Horseface and her husband, the Duke of Lumpsome, as his guardians. Jealous and wishing for power themselves, they went a long way to mistreat the prince, for it hadn't yet occurred to the fools that when Prince Harry grew up and took the throne, he'd be powerful enough to smash them like insects should he so choose.

What no one knew was that the Evil Sorceror hadn't really been vanquished. He'd spent the intervening years finding his loyal followers. Incorporeal at first, he made his servants carry out heinous acts that gave him a body and most of his magical strength back, even though he was hideous to behold. He hid in a cave on the outskirts of the kingdom, biding his time and waiting for his opportunity to strike.

On the Prince's sixteenth birthday, the Duke and Duchess grudgingly scheduled a ball, because though they hated the Prince with all of their being, they did like a good party, and they knew the council would not argue with any extravagant expense on behalf of their young hero. In fact, they insisted upon it. As such--

###

"Alright, there?" said Draco, as he looked up from the rapt Weasley children to find Harry staring a hole through him, less than amused.

"Just fine, Malfoy," said Harry, his expression very clearly broadcasting that he was not quite able to decide if he was offended or annoyed, but unwilling to take it up here and now, so this had better be good. Instead, he took a breath and smoothed Celina's hair as he murmured, "Finish your story."

Izzie whispered loudly to Angie, "Mummy says when they drag the last names out, one of two things is bound to happen, and she'll explain the one that's not a fight when I'm older. I suspect it's--"

Angie giggled as did Arthur and Jonathan, and Draco gave her a small shake. "Thank you. That's quite enough, princess."

###

As such, The night of Prince Harry's birthday came, and the palace was lit up from one end to another and done up with decorations the Prince would never fully appreciate, but he thought they were nice nonetheless. He made his grand appearance in the ballroom and all of the kingdom applauded and cheered, which was hilarious given that the Prince was incredibly shy and not fond of crowds. Still he flushed rather prettily and made his way down the staircase, shaking hands and generally being insufferable.

Remember the Devastatingly Handsome Prince? Well, he was there with his father, the ruler of a neighboring kingdom, and he was riveted by the sight. Although he himself was gorgeous enough to stop traffic by either carriage or foot, this prince was quite taken with Prince Harry, and decided to find a way to make his way over and pay his kingdom's respects properly.

###

"Can I help you?" Draco asked Harry, whose stern expression had degenerated into uncontrollable snickering.

Harry stopped laughing with much difficulty and shook his head. "No, no. Please, go on."

"What was the Devastatingly Handsome Prince's name, Uncle Draco?" asked Angie, rolling her eyes.

"Let me guess," smirked Harry.

"Shhh. Story," said Draco.

###

Right. So the Duchess and the Duke also had a son about Prince Harry's age, a fat lump of a useless sod who fancied himself rather above his station given that he was cousin to the Prince and Heir, but who spent a good deal of time finding ways to make the Prince miserable, given that he wasn't the Prince himself. He was such a horrid little bastard, I forget his name, but we're going to call him Piggins.

Piggins was at the ball, too, and had also not missed Prince Harry's appearance, and oh, he was angry and jealous of the attention, as he always was. Now, you know as well as I do that people who are angry and jealous don't think straight, and so he made a beeline for the Prince, somehow beating the Devastatingly Handsome Prince to the punch, probably because he was barrelling through the crowd without regard for anyone he trampled underfoot. When he got to Harry, he put on a worried expression that made him resemble something close to a choleric warthog.

"Prince Harry! You've got to come quick!" he squealed. Err. Wailed.

Prince Harry cocked his head at his cousin, half-waiting for a fist to the midsection or some other petty cruelty. "...What?" he asked warily.

"It's my mother!" said Piggins, appealing to Prince Harry's nature as an heroic sap. "She's hurt, and she's asking for you!"

Only hesitating for a moment, Prince Harry nodded. "Show me." Heroic he was, but not the most intelligent some days, and too trusting by half.

He followed Piggins out of the ballroom but when Piggins stopped in a back corridor, Prince Harry took a step back. "The Duchess is just fine, isn't she?"

Piggins smiled nastily, and clocked the Prince directly upside his pretty face. Prince Harry went down hard and was out cold.

###

"Oh bollocks!" shouted Johnathan. "Uncle Harry would have kicked him in his--"

"Shhh!" said Draco, pointing at the boy. "Who said we were talking about Uncle Harry? This is Prince Harry's story, thanks."

Harry leaned over and ruffled Johnathan's hair mumbling, "That's my boy."

"Shhh!"

###

Anyway. Prince Harry woke up in the dark with a bad headache and an unattractive bruise on his cheek. He stood up and felt about him, and came to the conclusion that he was in a closet. When he found the door, he banged and banged on it until it came open, a small gnarled servant named Dobby opened it.

"Master Harry!" shouted Dobby. "Why are you in the closet?"

Obvious as the answer was, Prince Harry did not answer. Enraged, he went directly to the ballroom and sought out his cousin, Piggins. When he arrived at the ballroom, the fact that the crowd had thinned dramatically told him that he had missed most of the party, and great clock only confirmed it. Even the Devastatingly Handsome Prince had gone home with his father, thinking like everyone else who had noticed that the Prince had gone missing that he'd found some way to distract himself.

When he found Piggins, he grabbed him by the collar, spinning Piggins to face the Prince, even though the lump outweighed him by at least five stone, such was the nature of his wrath.

"You've laid hands on me for the last time," said the Prince, loudly enough for anyone in the great ballroom to witness. "As Prince and Heir, I command that you be exiled from my kingdom, never to return upon pain of death."

A loud wail rose up from the Duchess' direction and Piggins made to take a swing at the Prince. The Prince, however, was ready this time and dodged it easily, and the palace guards removed him from sight.

Prince Harry left the party with a glare for his aunt and uncle and lived in peace for all of about a fortnight. During that time, the Duchess spent her nights staring out of the window, and her days wailing and gnashing her teeth, tearing at her hair, which did nothing for her already-haggard appearance. Desperate and out of the half a mind she'd possessed to begin with, she got out her sister's magical books and paraphernalia, and set to conjuring a demon from whom she could demand help in gaining her revenge.

The Duchess Horseface, however was terrible at magicks, which would be why she never got as far as her sister the Queen. In reading the incantations, she ad-libbed, asking for a 'scourge to her nephew; his greatest fear and potential downfall' rather than just someone that could give him warts and make him wither and die.

As such, she did in fact call up a scourge specific to Prince Harry - the Evil Sorceror of legend.

"Bring me his heart, foul creature!" shouted the Duchess. "Bring me his heart so that I may smash it underfoot as he has done mine!"

###

Harry was staring at Draco again, expression unreadable.

With the quirk of his lip, Draco cocked his head ever so slightly right back, but then Izzie poked his knee and he remembered to go on.

###

So, the Prince was living it up these days, knowing that it was less than a year until his official ascension to the throne, and that his cousin would trouble him no more. Certainly he'd heard of his aunt's affliction, but he cared not, given her own treatment of Prince Harry these past fifteen years. He was more cheerful and carefree than he'd ever been, and the palace household loved him more than ever. Not that they ever hadn't, given he was everyone's favorite Golden Boy, but this was ridiculous. Rumor was, he'd be the best ruler the kingdom had ever seen, and every one of his subjects lavished him with love and adulation.

During his time, Prince Harry also did a lot of hiding in the palace gardens.

Which is where Dobby found him early in the morning roughly two weeks after the exile of Piggins. Dobby was more overexcited than ever, and carrying a rucksack almost as big as he.

"Master Harry!" Dobby cried. "Master Harry! You must go!"

Prince Harry looked at Dobby as though he might be mad, which, in all fairness was probable. "Go where? Dobby, slow down."

"Go, sire! Away!" Dobby said, agitated as he slammed his own head into a nearby tree. "MmmRPH! I should be beheaded for the disrespect of telling you to leave your own castle! But you must! Your aunt, she's conjured something horrible and it's after you. She told it to pluck out your heart!"

"That's impossible, Dobby," said the pretty, yet dim Prince. "My aunt doesn't know how--"

"Your mother's books, sire," said Dobby, wringing his hands. "I heard-- I saw!!"

Suddenly the clouds went dark and began rolling over the gardens at an unnatural pace, and Prince Harry's eyes widended. Dobby thrust the rucksack into his hands and rubbed his hands together. "Go, sire! I will do my best to slow him!" Prince Harry took another step backward as Dobby turned his back to him and held his hands up in the face of the encroaching darkness and shouted, "You shall not harm the Prince!"

Without another thought, Prince Harry fled out of the gardens, to the rear gate. He strapped the rucksack on, climbed the wooden ladder onto the battlements and looked out over the edge, before shutting his eyes and concentrating on the little magic he knew he could do on his own. He then took a step off of the wall, gritting his teeth... and sank slowly, step by step to the earth.

As his feet hit the ground, he continued to run, though he did not know where, running through the forest at top speed in fear for his very life. Eventually he tired and slowed, but didn't dare stop, continuing to trot and then walk, and then finally trudge when he could do more.

Suddenly a huge weight hit him in two places on his shoulderblades, sending him sprawling with a huge weight on his back, holding him down.

A dark, frightening voice growled in the Prince's ear, "He's offered a prize for your heart, pretty thing, and I've just the teeth to get it for him."

###

"I don't like it!" wailed Celina, burying her face against Harry's chest. "Stop it!"

Bobby and Martin exchanged a look before one said, "He'll be fine, 'Lina."

"You'll see," said the other. "He's the hero."

"He's not allowed to die," the first said with a nod.

"Right, Uncle Draco?" they said simultaneously.

"Exactly," said Draco, as Harry soothed Celina. "What he said-- SHHH."

###

What felt like a paw turned Prince Harry over and he was now face to face with the gaping maw of a giant, slobbering wolf. The wolf bared his teeth again, but suddenly pulled back as if burned."You-- you can't--," it growled.

"Me?" said Prince Harry, shaking even as he tried to scramble away.

"I didn't think..." the wolf said. "I didn't think you'd look just like them."

Prince Harry shook his head, swallowing hard as he tried to stand. "Like who?"

"Your parents. The king and queen," said the wolf, "they were my friends until the Sorceror trapped me in this form. He promised to give my normal form back if I brought him your heart... but I can't do it." The wolf lowered his belly and tail to the ground, nose between his paws. "You look just like them. I'm not worth it."

"Oh god. Oh god, thank you," said Prince Harry, "I'm so... I'm... hang on. Did you say, the Sorceror is who's after me? But I thought he was dead?"

The wolf shook his head. "No he's alive, or what passes for it." A frenzy of wolf calls sounded in the forest nearby, and the wolf sprang to his feet again. "None of the others will let you escape. Listen very carefully. I'm going to kill a deer and bring him its heart, and lie and say it's yours. That should buy you enough time to make it through the woods there," he said pointing with his nose, "to a cottage where there lives a family with strong ancient magic, hidden well from the Sorceror's own. They'll protect you-- do you understand?"

"How--?" said the Prince, cut off by a series of howls, closer than the last.

"Go!" snarled the wolf, as he bounded back into the trees and began calling in return.

Say what you want about Prince Harry, but he caught on quickly when his life was on the line, at least. He ran in the direction the wolf told him to run, and didn't look back. The wolf did exactly as he promised he would do, though when the treachery was discovered, things did not go well for him.

###

"Poor wolf," sniffled Izzie.

"Professor Lupin won't take it well that you've gone and killed him off," said Arthur.

"I didn't say he was dead!" Draco said defensively. "I only said things didn't go well for him. Nor did I say it was Lupin! Pay attention!"

"See Artie. He 'scaped," Celina murmured. "He's a hero, too. They don't die, 'member?"

###

Exhausted, Prince Harry finally broke through the woods and into a clearing, where he saw a snug little cottage, bursting with light and sound and the smells of fresh baking. Smoke was puffing from the chimneys and there were... I don't know. Birds chirping and bunnies frolicking in the yard. He got as far as the front step, where he knocked twice, then promptly fell over and passed out before the door was opened by a ginger-haired man, only about a meter tall.

"Well. Been expecting this one for days, now," he said, raising his voice to shout, "Siblings! Our guest is here!"

###

"I don't think it's fair that the Prince spends all that time passing out," said Harry, arching an eyebrow. "First Piggins, now this..."

"He's a delicate creature, alright? He's been sheltered," said Draco with a shrug.

"His cousin spent fifteen years beating on him!" said Harry, hand thrown up. "How's that delicately sheltered?"

"Hmm. You know what I think?" Draco said thoughtfully. "I think you should be very quiet and pay attention to the bl-- story."

###

When Prince Harry woke up, he found that he was in a bed that was comfortable if oddly lumpy there in the middle toward his bum.

###

Izzie, Bobby and Martin giggled uncontrollably.

Harry muttered, "Oh for--"

###

Which it turned out when Prince Harry sat up, was because he was lying on two short beds pushed together. He looked about, only to find that a diminutive girl with flaming red hair staring at him, suddenly flailing wildly as he focused on her and murmured, "Where--?"

"He's awake!!" she shouted, oblivious to Prince Harry's resultant need to stick a finger in the ear closest her to make sure that it wasn't bleeding.

No sooner had the girl bellowed, than the room was flooded with six other ginger dwarves in various states of cheer, all somewhat hirsute and none taller than the one wearing a fang dangling from one ear, who couldn't have been taller than one and a quarter meters, and none shorter than the female, who was lucky to reach Prince Harry's hip.

###

"Tha's my dad!" said Jonathan. "Only mum says he's not to wear the earring anymore." He looked at Draco and rolled his eyes. "I know, I know. 'Shhh'."

###

"We've been waiting for you!" said the tallest dwarf. "I'm Bill. These are my brothers Charlie, Percy, Fred, George and Ron, and my sister Ginny."

As he introduced them, they all murmured greetings, and Prince Harry furrowed his brow. "Um, not to be ungrateful or anything, but how-- I mean-- are you the family that the wolf sent me to?"

There was a murmur among the siblings and Ron muttered, "We knew that someone would send you, but the wolf..."

"...Is curious," said Percy. "We thought they all worked for Him."

"This one... he said he knew my parents," said Prince Harry. "If that's any help."

Another murmur rippled through their ranks and Charlie spoke next. "You see, boy, he's not really a wolf."

"So I heard," said Prince Harry. "And I'm not boy. I'm... James," he added, hoping to use his middle name to remain incognito.

"Hear that, boys?" said Fred with an approving nod. "This Prince is on his toes."

"Yes!" agreed George, who appeared to be Fred's twin. "Usually takes more than one offense 'fore someone thinks of using an assumed name."

Prince Harry rolled his eyes and dropped his hands to the sheet. "I didn't know I was the one doing the offending."

"Not here, anyway," said Ginny with a grin that practically radiated little hearts, completely unaware of the fact that the Devastatingly Handsome Prince had laid claim on him already.

###

The snickering from the older children reached a crescendo as Harry pointed, "I said, watch yourself, didn't I?"

Draco eyed him, smug and unphased. "Children, we're going to play a fun game now-- it's called 'Harry No Talking Time', and if Harry talks, Harry loses. Can't have him interrupting the story endlessly, now, can we?"

Harry's expression clouded over. "Taking this a little far aren--"

Pointing at Harry, Izzie said solemnly, "That's your warning, Uncle Harry."

###

Anyway, they made it clear that Prince Harry would be safe as long as he stayed with them there at the cottage, and since Prince Harry had no desire to be torn limb from limb either by man-wolves or murdering sorcerors, he readily agreed. They made him a better bed that very day and placed it at the end of the large, upstairs bedroom that all the dwarves shared.

The other stipulation was that the magical wards on the cottage only stretched for half a kilometer in all directions, and Prince Harry needed to be very careful when he was out and about not to cross them, else his location might be scryed or sensed by those who knew how, or seen by any passers-by. To this end, Charlie measured a length of thick twine out to a distance of just under half a kilometer and tied it to the waterpump near the back door, and that way if Prince Harry wanted or needed to go out into the woods, he could take the end of the twine with him, knowing exactly when to stop when he reached the end of the line.

In other words, Prince Harry was safe as long as he was tethered to the house, and while this was a questionable sentiment, the prospect of bloody dismemberment outweighed the idea that he was tied to a cottage filled with ginger dwarves. As such, the first day that the dwarves left the house to work, Prince Harry poked about the house wondering what he might do to thank them for their kindness. He settled on picking berries and washing the breakfast dishes, then he tried his hand at the broom and the duster and realized that he'd clearly been born with some very pedestrian skills. Over the course of the next few weeks, he read old cookbooks and basically made himself useful for once.

###

Draco paused and looked up at Harry, who was predictably glaring, yet saying nothing. Smiling, he said, "Impressive. Celina, give your Uncle Harry a kiss for us, won't you?"

Celina plopped a fat kiss on his cheek and settled back in. "Good job, Uncle Harry. I knew you could win if you wanted."

###

Soon almost a year had passed, and though Prince Harry missed the bustle and luxury of palace life, he was strangely content in the hov-- the cottage. But there came a day when he had taken the twine out into the woods to gather berries for dinner, swearing loudly when he reached the end of the line. You see, not a foot out of his reach was a bush full of the juiciest berries, and his basket was only half-full.

Surely, Charlie had measured under when he'd cut the twine? And surely, it was caught on a shrub or something, thought Prince Harry. He gave in to the impulse and let go of the twine, just long enough to take a step forward and pull the berries off of the shrub and toss then into his basket.

Here's part of the story that I haven't told you-- you see, this corner of the forest was just within the borders of the Devastatingly Handsome Prince's kingdom, and though he rode past the cottage on an almost daily basis, he'd never seen it because of the magic that protected it. Still, when Prince Harry let go of that twine stepped out of the wards, he was exposed, and as it just so happened, the Devastatingly Handsome Prince was out on one of his rides. He caught sight of the farm boy that looked so much like the Prince Harry that had tragically disappeared only a year ago and he couldn't help moving closer, fascinated by the fact that his hair seemed to have a life of its own, or the way that he would pop every fifth berry in his mouth with this look---

Right. But just then, the Devastatingly Handsome Prince's horse whinnied and Prince Harry's head came up in an instant. He dashed over to the end of the twine and took hold of it, only then daring to look at the Devastatingly Handsome Prince, taken utterly by his hair, the very model of shiny platinum glinting in the sun, almost as bright as the armor bearing the family crest along with his personal modifications that had turned the snake into a gleaming dragon.

###

"Fair warning," said Arthur, holding a hand up. "If there's kissing, I'll vomit."

"Me too!" said Bobby and Martin. Angie remained suspiciously quiet, as did Izzie and Johnathan.

Celina sighed and hugged Harry. "I like kisses. Everyone should."

###

Part Two